Victor E Frankl wrote in his book ‘Mans Search for Meaning’ that “Man is ultimately Self Determining” by that he means that all we have in our our life is by our own doing.
I hear you say, “its not my fault I’m like this, they have done this to me. I feel crap because of her/him.
Well you may very well have others to thank for some experiences, however, you have always been the one in control of how long it continues to affect your direction.
You determine the length of your pain. Do you continue to be the adolescent and play victim, or do you put your thinking cap on, study, learn, critique yourself.
If past hurts, family, friends, experiences have created this negative attachment to you. Use it to drive you to flourish, grow, learn.
Become the leader you were destined to be.
Learn, learn, learn.